help.

i should have known that as soon i wrote my i'm on a roll post, that i would get stuck in a reading rut. i wrote that post june 1 and didn't finish run with the horsemen until almost the end of july.
but! let it not be a discouragement.. i think i'm back on the track.
i just finished kathryn stockett's the help and man. oh. man. is it everything it was cracked up to be. i was 100% charmed from the beginning and laughed out loud so many times.. sometimes loud enough to get shushed by my husband. fortunately for him, he didn't have to endure it long, since it took me no time to finish. i could hardly put that book down. and when i had put it down, i was constantly itching to pick it back up. i wished it could go on forever.

as with any good book that comes to an end, i was left with a feeling of emptiness coupled with a feeling of urgency to pick up something else. so i turn to travis for a suggestion, and i went with it. what's next on the list? ender's game. i've heard him talk about it for so long, most recently with andrea, as she's borrowed a few from the series from him, that it's probably a perfect choice. something different that i probably should have read a while ago. we'll see!

i have discovered greatness today.

We've lived in Nashville for exactly six months, three weeks and five days and the whole time I've been searching for a great radio station. I have to tell you, I've actually been shocked by the fact that there is no true oldies station... classic rock, yes; motown/50s pop-rock, no. This has been especially sad for me this summer since at home, we listen to nothing but WMXX-FM Kool 103 in the summer time. But I digress......

In browsing the various stations (half of which are, naturally, country) here in NashVegas, I have found a small handful that I enjoy, with one of them being Lightning 100. And that's where I made my "discovery." If you're not familiar with this station, they play some stuff you've heard before, but a lot of artists that are in no way mainstream get airplay here. And this is where I heard the Traveling Wildburys. Maybe it's a shame that I didn't know this collaboration ever existed, but hey... better late than never! I'm just thrilled that there was a moment in time when two of my all time favorite artists (Petty and Orbison) joined up with some other legendaries (Dylan, Lynn and Harrison) to create really great music. What's even better [for me] is that I know about it.

So what have I done with my new-found knowledge? I made a Pandora station, of course! It's greatness. You should give it a whirl!

movie mission

trav and i just got home yesterday from a lovely, much-needed vacation. his parents and some family friends had gone in together to rent a house in hot springs village, ar and we were able to stay with them a few days. when we arrived we were told we'd be staying in the library which wound up being a little study with a double bed and about 400 VHS tapes. yes, they were an outdated format, but that didn't keep us from noticing that the collection was probably one of the best we'd ever seen, including several movies either i, travis or both of us had never seen but have always wanted to see. so, i decided that i would make a list of some of those movies so as to [hopefully] move a few steps toward actually seeing them.

so our movie mission is as follows [in no particular order]:

• The Pianist
• Life As A House
• Wit
• Hello Dolly!
• When Harry Met Sally
• Jurassic Park
• Back To The Future
• Amelie
• La Dolce Vita
• An American In Paris
• Godfather Trilogy
• Terminator movies
• The Bridge On The River Kwai
• All Quiet On The Western Front
• Zulu
• Butterfield 8
• Iris
• What Dreams May Come
• Some Like It Hot
• Dead Poets Society
• National Velvet
• A Room With A View
• Shawshank Redemption
• Lawrence of Arabia
• Dr. Zivago

So, if any of you friends happen to own a copy of one/some of these, holler at us and we'll do a movie night! (of course, now that we're back in nashville, only dvds will do)

eve

the following is the first of a series of short bible studies i want to continue. it's based on the women of the bible; the first, of course, being Eve. basically what i did is read the passages of scripture that refer to her and jotted things down verse-by-verse.. things i gleaned from the story. then i wrote out more thoughts on where i felt i was being led by the passage read. these thoughts were also influenced by Henry's Concise Commentary on the Bible, found on biblegateway.com. all quotes, unless associated with a specific scripture, are taken from this commentary. all emphasis is my own addition. but before all that, i'd encourage you to read the passage (there's a link below), first.

women of the bible: eve. gen 2:18 - 3:24

2:18-25 ---

• companion, helper, unique [created for this purpose]
• made from man's rib during his sleep
• presented to man [perhaps as a gift?]
• longed for [v. 23 "Finally!..."]
• man puts her above all other creatures; she is embraced

3:1-24 ---

• deceived by the clever serpent when she is alone
• gave some of the fruit to Adam
• stripped of God's shelter from shame and evil
• had a relationship with God that she (with man) harmed
• protected by God from the serpent [v. 14-15 "...crush your head... bruise his heel"]...
• but still experiences consequences [v. 16]
• mother of all the living
• clothed by God
• protected from making another potential mistake [guarded from the Tree of Life]
• cast out and made to work the ground from which they'd been made
• banished from the garden

Satan tempted Eve, that by her he might tempt Adam. It is his policy to send temptations by hands we do not suspect, and by those who have the most influence upon us. Henry's Concise Commentary on the Bible

Eve is trusted... God created man and woman to trust each other. it is Satan in serpent form that manipulates that trust and creates separation between man and the goodness intended for them.

Satan attempts to create doubt about the trueness of all the good things with which God sets us up in the beginning. "He teaches men first to doubt & then to deny." He tries to make us "discontented with [our] present state."

Satan was discontented and therefore "ruined" himself. he uses the same methods in which he ruined himself to ruin us. misery loves company.

when they realized they were naked "they saw the happiness they fell from and the misery they were fallen into." God's question "Where are you?" is rhetorical... actually making it even more clear to Adam and Eve what it is they've gotten themselves into. They are being made aware of the obvious - they have made their own beds & must now lie in them. they know in this moment that though they were deceived, God is not deceived. "Though [Satan] is the tempter, we are the sinners." it is up to us whether or not we buy into his tricks.

-----------------------

these moments recorded in Genesis are what most refer to as the Fall of Man. before this deception, man and woman.. the whole earth.. was just as God had intended. however, a mistake, a mind game, a moment of loneliness brought Eve, the mother of all living, to doubt all the goodness that surrounded her. i imagine her thoughts, wondering if there were something better. i imagine her taking a bite of that fruit from the tree in the middle of the garden, the one God told them not to even touch, thinking there will be a great enlightenment. i imagine her convincing Adam to share with her in this experience and come to know all God knows. and indeed, their minds' eyes were opened. opened to a world of shame, of guilt, of separation and distrust.

my thoughts, when reflecting on this, brings me to ask some questions: "how often have i let Satan manipulate me into being blinded to the blessings of my life and lead me down a road that leads to an ultimate severing from all that is good?" "how many times have i allowed myself to be discontented instead of knowing that God is faithful?" "why do i find myself yearning for something more instead of trusting that the Almighty holds me in his hands?"

all those questions have to do with one thing: my choice to control my own thoughts and not to let them be tossed about like "wind-whipped waves" [James 1:5-8]. there is so much power in remembering that God is a Rock in this weary land we people have created for ourselves.

the serpent is, indeed, clever and knows us well. my prayer after this study is to resist his twisting of the truth; his manipulation of the mind which leads to a harrowing of the heart. and to know that though there's nothing i can do to change the way of man, to go back in time and prevent that first fall, He is faithful and He, through Christ, will let me rise.

i'm on a roll!

i mentioned earlier that i am not one to make lists. actually, i'm not one to make lists about what i am going to do. however, i do like to make lists of things i've accomplished. that seems to motivate me better.. like i've got a good habit i don't want to bust.

so i want to make a list of all the books i've read since the beginning of the year. it may not seem too impressive.. but if you know me, you'll understand. pretty sure i've read more books in the last six months than i have in the previous two years. here it is:

1-4. Nora Roberts' Bride Quartet (mom gave them to me to read, so i went for it)

1. Vision in White

2. Savor the Moment

3. Bed of Roses

4. Happy Ever After

5. The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver (really frustrating, really great)

6. To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee (one of Travis's faves. and one i've wanted to read forever)

7. I, Mona Lisa by Jeanne Kalogridis (historical fiction set in Renaissance Florence. my favorite on this list.)

8. Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes (another i've always wanted to read and so glad i finally did. very interesting)

9. Lucia, Lucia by Adriana Trigiani (a re-read. kind of sad, but really cool. Trigiani always writes about women who are super talents in their field and yet gives all of them a soft side.)

10. [in progress] Run with the Horsemen by Ferrol Sams (i told Travis i needed something that would make me laugh and he told me to read it. only 60ish pages in and i've already laughed aloud several times.)

11. [in progress] Love Wins: a Book about Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived by Rob Bell (our Bible study group is currently reading/discussing this. and it's really great. i think the key, though is realizing who Bell is writing to. you should read it.)

so there you go! since we got married and combined our libraries, i've had a bunch of good choices for 'what to read next.' they range from classics i've always wanted to read, books i haven't gotten to yet, re-reads because i want to see if i still love it as much as i did the first time, and completely new ones i've never heard of.

so, what's on deck?

when i finish 'Horsemen', i think i'll opt for something heavier. my first inclination is

1. Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead.. just because it would be a huge challenge and, therefore, totally rewarding. Another good option would be

2. Stieg Larson's The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I bought it in an airport last summer and haven't even cracked it open. I'd love to finish out the series after that.

other honorable mentions for possible next-reads:

3. Jeffrey Archer's False Impression (about corrupt art dealing),

4. Sarah Dunant's Birth of Venus (historical fiction also set in Renaissance Florence. a re-read),

5. George Orwell's 1894 (started it and never finished it. would like to try again), or

6. C. S. Lewis's Chronicles of Narnia (read them all in middle school. attempted to read again until i realized that book 4 of our series -originally belonging to Trav- has a big chunk that's been torn out. so we'll have to do something about that first)

also, all suggestions/recomendations are more than welcome!

block party!

i want to clarify something. maybe the description of a blog doesn't have to be so clearly stated.. but looking back on last night's post, i realize it kinda sounds depressing. i'm here to tell you not to worry! my main point was just to say that this little piece of cyber space is going to be a whatever blog. not always about spirituality or introspective deep thinking, like it was before. i'm excited about posting a wide variety of things. my inspiration is drawn from one of my best friends, andrea. she has lots of lists and things, which i'm not really into but the thought of putting out there whatever i want to share -therefore not topic-specific- sounds awesome.

so. now that i think i've cleared the air, on to the good stuff.

IT'S SUMMER!! okay okay. if you're one of those people that is going to point out to me that we still have a few weeks before the actual beginning of summer, don't waste your keystrokes. i'm well aware. but just because i'm aware doesn't mean that i'm not dying to swim in a pool, craving a burger hot off the grill or driving around with the windows down and the music UP! school is OUT and it's time to have some fun!

i've created a new Pandora station based on "That Thing You Do!" by The Wonders. Yes, I love that movie and Yes, every song sounds like it ought to be piping through outdoor speakers and the best summer block party ever. so in that vein, i'm gonna post a few of my summertime faves! enjoy!

In The Sun - Blondie

Girls In Their Summer Clothes - Bruce Springsteen

California Girls - The Beach Boys

That Thing You Do! - The Wonders

(Love Is Like A) Heat Wave - Martha Reeves and the Vandellas

blackout zone.

so i think i've pinpointed the problem i've been having with this blog. i boxed myself in.

when i revamped it back in '08, i gave it a specific theme - driven by grace - but that is not the only purpose i want this thing to serve anymore.

it was just too.. focused. ... which would leave me feeling like if i wanted write on/in [whatever.] this thing, i'd have to limit myself.

it was good for me then, but that's not what i need now.

in my mind right now i'm picturing a scenario.. one in which everyone has probably found themselves. imagine you're in class, or at work, or at home in the middle of doing whatever.. the daily grind, or perhaps even something a little more demanding... and for no apparent reason, the power goes out. completely dead. no lights, no computers, no overhead projector or p.a. system, no loud air conditioners or television. there's always a certain sense of freedom when that happens. you are not held responsible for the work you were doing [or supposed to be doing] because no machinery is responding and you can't see to even pick up a pencil and write something down. it's just you and all the other guys around who come out of their offices to congregate or look around in vain from their desks just to say 'hey. power's out!'. it's kinda like a free time pass. a time where your brain can expand after being under some sort of previously unknown pressure. that free feeling is what i'm seeking.

i need an outlet. a release. something somewhere where i can just say what's on my mind without it being pertinent/relevant/timely/appropriate. and i'm making it right here.

consider this an official notice of another revamp. i'll probably change the title [though my old posts will still be here] and it will probably look a little different. but it's exactly what we [the blog and me] need.

from here on out, we're gonna just let things flow. let the thoughts out that get pushed back all too often because, comparatively, "they're just not that important." i'm realizing the pressure from that push-back that's made me feel - on even a bigger scale than the former intentions of this blog - boxed in. like there's so much light shining on so many things in my mind that it's overwhelming.

i need to unplug. so this will be my blackout zone.

restart.

So, it seems that living in Italy, getting engaged, planning a wedding and starting a new married life have taken their toll on my blogging attempts. Realizing this, I'd like to take this opportunity to start sharing again. Yes, I'd like to restart.

With a new start comes a lot of new challenges, perspectives and experiences and they are exactly what I would love to write about here in hopes of not only helping myself to articulate them, but also 'throwing them out there' and getting feedback. So, if you've ventured here, I hope you'll return and join with me in this renewed commitment to stay driven by grace.